🔗 Share this article

“Well, the situation is pretty dire here. The guidance we offer all of our clients to invest all their resources into canned food and shotguns.” This piece of shrewd guidance comes from the Brain Gremlin – a lab-engineered, speaking, glasses-wearing member of the oozy monster mob that infests Manhattan’s super-smart Clamp Tower skyscraper in director Joe Dante’s zany follow-up Gremlins 2: The New Batch. Superficially, it’s simply an investment tip from one monster to another. However, in a strange manner, it’s also pretty solid life guidance. Truly, hear me out.

When situations deteriorate, the biggest mistake you can do is take things too seriously. The Brain Gremlin comprehends this. Actually, the majority of the fang-bearing creatures that occupy Dante’s unrestrained 1990 movie (possibly his finest) possess the same knowing, self-referential sense of humour regarding the hazy boundary separating the mundane and unadulterated chaos. It’s a particular aspect of Gremlins 2: The New Batch that keeps me coming back – and as I age, it’s the theme that echoes the loudest.

A Childhood Fascination

Understandably, my connection with this movie did not begin on such an introspective level. As a child, we only had a few battered VHS tapes at home. Part of that group were Gremlins and its follow-up, the latter housed in a bulky previously-rented case likely purchased from an independent video outlet and sporting growling monsters on its knackered cover. I was immediately enamoured and these films wasted no time lodging themselves inside my tiny, impressionable mind. From then on, they became an near-everyday part of my early years entertainment regimen.

Dante’s first film typically gets all the plaudits, thanks primarily due to its status as a partly frightening holiday classic – and let me be clear, I’ve watched Gremlins more times than I can count. However, its successor seldom receives the same level of elevated esteem, which feels criminal. As a kid, I’d never miss an opportunity to watch Gremlins 2. During sunny school summer breaks, I’d retreat into the house and play it. When I obtained my very own TV-VHS combo unit, it remained on repeat in my bedroom. Over time, it ingrained itself in my mental framework. If my parents observed this fixation, they didn’t seem to mind.

Deeper Rewards and Societal References

As I matured, new revelations enhanced frequent screenings, heightening the enjoyment of watching diminutive verdant beasts happily vandalize a New York high-rise. I learned the future-focused property magnate and Clamp Tower owner, Daniel Clamp (John Glover), was modeled closely on the eventual commander-in-chief Donald Trump, with his red-headed employee Marla (Haviland Morris) alluding to his former spouse Marla Maples. Luckily, Clamp possesses greater compassion than his actual-world equivalent.

The “apocalyptic” video Clamp plays during maximum monster mayhem? I discovered it was based on a actual “Doomsday” video produced by the CNN boss Ted Turner as a contingency for the world really ended. I noticed how Dante made a special effort to film varying versions of a meta sequence where Gremlins hijack the actual feature in progress. A version for theaters, one for VHS and TV, each delivering a smirking slice of self-referential entertainment sorcery prior to the concept being mainstream.

A Persistent Appeal

While it was creature designer Rick Baker’s fantastically vile creatures that drew my gaze as a child, this deeper gold held my interest as an adult. Ultimately, I even conversed with Dante about it myself and he had no hesitation informing me he made the movie with the specific aim of mocking those who loved its silly-yet-sincere predecessor and desired a sequel. “We were going to make fun of the fact you came to see it,” he happily revealed. This cartoonish rebelliousness and resolve to not take his sequel as seriously as his Warner Bros bosses clearly wanted him to, only made me love it even more.

When I went through a sudden family bereavement earlier this year, I was taken aback to discover that, during my heightest mourning, all I desired to do was sit and watch Gremlins 2: The New Batch. Weird, right? Maybe not. The comforting familiarity it provided was essential to dilute my mind’s mourning mire – but the stuff it had imparted to me as an adult were equally valuable.

Like Gremlins rampaging through a genetics laboratory, there’s particular aspects in life you just can’t control. Dante knows it. The Brain Gremlin knows it too. Sometimes, you have to emulate them: embrace the chaos, invest all your resources into canned food and shotguns and try not to take things too seriously.

It’s robust worldly wisdom from a very unlikely source – and it’s why Gremlins 2: The New Batch will eternally stand as my go-to cinematic solace.